Rebounding From Being The Hurtee

Last week was a total blur and nightmare..that's why I havent updated.

My job drove me to such a brink of insanity all circling "Lost In Translation" and I even spent a good 3 days wondering if i should delete this blog entirely....

I felt like for this blog to not need translation and to be translated incorrectly on top of people not commenting the way I would like in terms of frequency and I'm STILL getting hacked altogether ..I just started to feel with all the stress, excuse my french but FUCK it.

I sat and stared at the "delete this blog" button.

I'm sick of things being so chopped and screwed for me...and I actually had to read Joshens advice multiple times being that he's the first to comment in a long time on any post. I was starting to do exactly as he instructed against. Lose.My.Mind.I didn't even want to get up some days last week. Inclusive of why I last minute ran away to an The Academy Is concert at Roseland ballroom..and called out the vey next day. Thanksgiving Eve I actually had to be carried into a cab and by the love of friends I was luckily transported from Williamsburg, Brooklyn to Penn Station in Manhattan.
Strictly by the love of friends...

This week you can imagine I was actually afriad to come to work..Literally afraid, with nervous stomach pains.

I was getting too used to being the "hurtee"...

New Jack Diction: "hurtee" (hurrr-teee): 1. receipiant of pain 2.selected individual who receives emotional pain from an attacker 3.emotional victim~syn: pain; see: sadness

Between work and slight communication issues with The Significant, and some other random happenings, especially one that could've involved a baby I was completely drained out. I just started to take the relaxed position and got used to being screamed at or blamed for something. And honestly, when you do that, it really starts to strip you down..

I started to lose sight of The Secret, and I'm remembering slowly you do have to be in control...you can't anticipate failure, and you certainly can't become comfortable with being the "hurtee". When everyone else realizes that they can then be the "hurter", they'll trample you completely...

...and last time I checked, there was no fun in being walked on....