I'm Going to Tanya Harding a Ho

My car is officially totaled..

As in, non-existent...non functional...not here...not to be repaired.

They cut me a check, and despite the economic times & my far from stellar credit I took my dollars and dreams and spent the entire weekend in higher spirits feeling on Friday I was going to OWN a Pontiac G6-GT.
Instead, today is Sunday and I'm confined to my home with no transportation and no hopes of a car unless I come up with $3,000.

What the HELL happened to me in April 2009?

I started the month with a salary cut, right off the back...glided into a workers comp injury..lost a total of probably 7 days from work which turned out to do way more damage to my life than good rest to my soul..then slid into a car accident, for them to to find the person who blatantly crashed into me NOT at fault & my car total out, leaving me the victim...car less.

Again, what exactly...did I do wrong for April 2009 besides want to celebrate my 23rd birthday in peace & happiness? Try to embrace the old woman-wrinkle club swag?
Cause really, April 2009 destroyed my swag and what I don't like is overflow...and it's apparently flowing over into May 2009 which I'm going to need to come to a complete hault immediately.

Thanks Jesus, with love, Management.

These varied unpretty April 2009 situations truly make me want to come through and "Tanya Harding" someone. Like the person who crashed into me...like the police officers who didn't really care...like my lack of control for not having the credit to turn around & buy a new car...like my job for giving salary cuts at the most inopportune time in all of history with no real proper warning so people could PLAN...

I'm just NOT seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I expressed that recently to Boss Lady. That I just don't see it, don't feel it and everything that's happening to me is screaming that there isn't one...
I feel myself just getting plain angry. Which is not within my character. I get upset, sad, very frustrated and can be a crybaby, but not just generally angry. Everything I do, I just feel anger about.

I guess, in all my anger someone should really keep an eye on me...
And keep me away from golf clubs...