Sunday, October 28, 2007

Hoop Dreams?

I am DESPERATELY seeking a talent manager. Maybe, just maybe that's where plans have gone awry all this time I've been attempting to make it. I'm trying to do anything and everything available. I was feeling very down about it, as I have felt while in attendance of college. A huge part of me felt I shouldn't have went in order to pursue my real dreams of making big. Maybe I woulda been La Lohan status already. Hopefully, minus the coke?? I mean....if we gotta get on the cover of every magazine known to the universe that is the EASY way to do it. The only exciting drugs I've done is alcohol, and frequent ganja abuse.

Anywho, needing a little inspiration I was in the Asia Nitollano forum. I'm a HUGE fan of hers, she inspires me as do many people within my age group. I'm trying to keep it registered in my head that at 21, I'm not OLD. Asia decided to NOT join PCD (The Pussycat Dolls) and continue working on her solo career. Diddy scooped her up for the Fall/Winter 2007 Sean Jean juniors collection. In which, sadly I must say, I don't usually support Sean Jean clothing but what Cassie, Lauren London and Asia are wearing in this video:

and in a lot of the photos posted to the forum is NOT bad. Rocawear has picked up Ciara and Chris Brown for their Fall/Winter 2007 campaign...the outfits are EXTREMELY hood rich. I'm not a fan. Ciara is someone else I have a love/hate relationship with. I feel like where Ciara is in life, being only some months older than me is where I should be RIGHT now and I'm not. Do I like her, yes; Do I envy her in a very disgusting manner, yes. Asia I have a LOVE/love relationship with. Kim Kardashian, I also have a LOVE/LOVE relationship with. I'm just confused as to why I'm not amongst these people as I rightfully BELONG to be. I keep getting started, and stopping. I keep getting hyped, and quiting. HOPEFULLY, with all this added prayer, 2 mentors: Nancy and Jeff; Some connections at Oneonta, and what seems like a slowly brewing fan base, I can really, truly do this. I FINALLY told my father that I want a talent manager. The thing I should have told him at 17 years of age, going to Oneonta, August of 2003.

Jeff is going to help me find ACTUAL "real people" work. He is the President of Force1Entertainment; a staffing agency in Manhattan that sets kids up with Entertainment Industry jobs. I got my friend Tk an interview there and the same day, he already has an interview with PBS.
Nancy understands more of the actual dream. She is established within her own career, grown and kindly-fierce. I'm more in -your -face fierce where as she is more seriously grown, much more experience in life do to her age and knows how to play the game fierce. She sees the potential in me and knows what I'm willing to do and how far I can go. I met Nancy at my Flying Television internship this summer. She sees shit very quickly; highly observant. I wrote and STILL write in my blogs, especially the Myspace for MY sanity. So much crap is always going on that I just need someone to tell it all to with initially NO interruptions. THEN I need feedback. That's exactly what my blogs do for me. It's the VIEWS that I get to my blogs that I never understood that Nancy picked up on. Even though there aren't many responses, people are READING them. Therefore, they're marketable so to speak.

There is so much shit I want to do, that I just NEVER knew how to begin. It was pointed out that maybe I should investigate moving to California. Has anyone ever noticed, the residents of NY with talent NEVER get discovered here, but in Cali? Residents of all the other damn states come to New York and get found in 10 minutes. Cassie is a prime example, of extremely lackluster talent and was discovered within ONE year of living in New York. I have been living in New York since I could WALK after moving from me PLEASE. Too many things I've tried HAVEN'T worked out, and I know that comes with the territory. I've had a bunch of people line me up and make me clear my schedule for photo shoots and then at the last minute cancel everything. I'm just trying to get shit off the ground. Semi-devise a portfolio that I can SHOW someone as proof: THIS is what I do, you CAN market me, let's go.
Yesterday, I spent a HUGE portion of my day just responding to Craigslist ads.

I'm TRYING...I just hope one of these days....I see something....

  • P.S. NEW WEBSITE! I've discovered this site: For anyone who has BEEN inside my bedroom they know I am the biggest makeup-hair product/appliance junkie on the planet. Whether it comes from drugstores or Nordstrom I'm going to try it. This site not only allows me to post things I like as recommendations to people, you can view stuff too before you run out and buy it!! I found this site during this past week, and have devised a wish-list. I've done the background info/ reviews on them already so if you want to take a look at the list and try something for yourself here you go!
Read my recommendations for makeup stuff that I know works, and doesn't work...take a look at the wish list and make wishes for yourself! Join

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