Life List

• My feet are calloused.
• I'm pretty much all cried out at this point, or so I believe.
• It took me half an hour to convince myself to get out of bed this morning.
• I took an additional 10 minutes trying to find an excuse to cancel.
• I was fighting tears from about 10 to 7 this morning.
• I wish I could say I'm exhausted, but I'm surprisingly not, just melancholy.
• Maybe melancholy is a light word for it.
• Big Urban Mixtape canceled their interview with me due to finding someone else for the position.
• Regardless of the struggles this morning, I went to my 11 a.m. interview in Manhattan.
• I would get paid $280 per week (after taxes).
• I have a bachelors degree.
• I am still jobless.
• I have no longer possess any motivation to seek a job.
• The Significant is highly frustrated with me.
• I cried and slept all of Long Island Railroad back home.
• It is now almost $12 for a one-way peak fare on LIRR.
• ...Not that I could afford it before the fare hike.....
• I see The Significant once every two weeks and wish I could be with him right now.
• In his frustration of my defeat, I'm not sure if that feeling is mutual.
• My birthday is in 5 weeks.
• I have none, and probably will not possess any money to get anything "done" to myself in order to look presentable. This is in the event that the party I'm attempting to throw actually goes through.
• As much as I don't want to be alone right now, I very much am, and will be for quite sometime.
• As much as I am alone right now, I guess its best it remain this way after experiencing the frustration of The Significant so that I do not burden others with my depression.
• I don't have anymore aspirations for myself.
• I don't see any of my efforts in life materializing.
• I do officially feel that I've wasted 4 years of my life attending college, and I still do not possess my degree in hand due to owing my school money.
• I guess, theres not much else to say about my life.
• Theres the list.